My afternoon ended with a quite large amount of bad vibes (BV) from blockmate friends. I don't really know why and so I kept blaming my impulsive moody self for this:
We finished a little late in the lab while my other friends who belong to the other lab were dismissed early. As we were waiting for our decon to end, we bummed out time by playing iPad games and sharing stories and such, those unexpected bonding moments that we surely miss from each other after spending almost half of our days in labwork. Then this friend of mine kept inviting everyone over for Kinect or dinner out somewhere, only that they could not decide where. I, being the underdog poorita, kept silent as I really don't know a place for such a worth-it dinner. I waited for them until our decon was already ready so that they can finally decide where we can eat. As I got back from tucking lab stuff away, our other blockmate was inviting everyone for dinner at their house as a pre-celeb for his birthday next week. Being that hungry and wanting to escape academic attachment for a while, I immediately beamed at everyone and beckoned them to join with me to our other blockmate's house. Unexpectedly, my close friends are all not quite excited to go. In fact, they really don't want to go. I do not know why! We could have our bonding moments at our other blockmate's house, can't we? Is it like, the more, the merrier? Apparently, they just don't want to go! After all those time of waiting for them to decide where to eat, and now that we got some offer for free, they would skip it? How about swallowing your pride and just go with the flow, bond with everyone? ARGH. I just don't know what to do. Looking at the poker faces of my close friends and just one close friend who would like to come, out of my insanity and indecisiveness, there, I decided just to go back home to the dorm. Bakit kasi kailangang sumpungin din sila? Eto na nga ako naghahanap ng bonding time and yesterday seemed to be the right time!
And so there, I walked my way back to the dorm, with earphones on my ears. Good thing one of my favorite songs, Chiisana Koi no Uta by Mongol 100 was playing, alleviating my bad mood.
As I was entering the dorm, I saw four kuyas from my other org, sitting and talking. They beckoned me to join them as they had this 'problem' of consuming all the ice cubes they had bought before it turns to water. And of course, me being so tired from walking and stressed from the situation I left at the Insti, joined their talk about nonsense things. It ended up me joining them again to search for dinner. Yes, search. Naglakbay pa kami ng ilang bundok para makarating sa kakainan na close din pala! Haha. And yes, being the only lady, I sure got all the nonsense bullying. It doesn't really matter to me, as I know that they are all joking and heck, nonsense is nonsense. I was practically laughing all the time.
My only problem is this one kuya who was kind of show-off. As we got back to the dorm to eat our take-out, this kuya started questioning everyone about other languages we know. And this kuya? He boastfully prides himself with how much he learn about Nihonggo. In my face talaga, mag gaganyan siya? BV vibes all over again, biglangang ang hangin on a summer night. GRRR. And he just doesn't want to stop even my expressions are so overyielding of saying "no, stop it you". Good thing, there's this another kuya who distracted me with his Mandarin words and experiences from being an exchange student to Xiamen. I was deliberately listening to this one kuya! And not with the other one who was starting a Japanese 101 lessons, starting with the introduction of oneself. Okay, ikaw na. Tama na, please??!
Tomorrow's another day, hope the BVs go away.
That was me these past days.
I stole attention in conversations.
I ripped my groupmates of peace of mind and free time.
I robbed my Stat prof of her teaching time.
I silenced talks I don't want to hear.
I demanded for allowance.
I uninvitingly helped myself to a friend's popcorn.
I skipped meetings and assignments in my org.
I chose one org over the other.
I volunteered for my sake.
I broke a guy friend's trust.
I am sorry.
I really am, guys.
I am very pleased to announce I have conquered, somehow finished, and somewhat started some of the things on my to-do list.
Today's list of accomplishments include:
1. Finishing things I needed to transact for my license.
It sure was a heavy dump of guilt in my heart as I watched and went with the flow on how governmenrt offices work, A little share of wealth and viola! One could finish a task requiring patience and wit too easily. Unfortunately, I was made to go like that this morning.It is a shame for an Iska to be doing something like that. People working on that office seem to know other part-time jobs. I was not to made my own choice in order to make my elders happy for me. I deserve not to be called an Iska. >.<
2. Ok'd Bagsakan duties.
It seems there's not much to bagsak for our schedule, and because of this, I believe, that our commhead told us co-heads that we should just try better at the Pahabol. The items submitted at Pahabol are only at half-points, though. :( We should really try our hardest next time. Especially because I can feel we have no supporting fund from the national body. TT__TT And the Bagsakan's gonna be a KKB event. >.< Arghhh. I was planning to be thrifty this season pa naman in order to buy gifts for my parents. I can see a bleak future with my empty wallet and limited ATM withdrawals. >.<
3. Started with labrep part.
Just started. I'm on my way for the second paragraph until my eyes urged me to lie on my bed and sleep. Thankfully, there's LJ on which I can shift my attention! Hope I won't be carried away. I need to finish this! Aja!
4. Finished Christmas shopping for manito and manita.
For manita, I have bought two things off her wishlist: a bento box with a mathching kerchief to wrap it up and a pillow. Hooray! Hope she'll like the bento box even though it looks childish. The pillow which I brought from Saizen looks really cute! I was tempted to buy her a DongA set of colored pens but fortunately, I found a good bento box. I was not as good as what I got last year, but at least it was layered. For manito, I bought his request of earphones. Definitely not from CD-R. :)) It was pretty good for a cheap hundred and twenty bucks. I'll buy the mouse pad or the cookies/desserts when I have the time next time.
THERE! I'm gonna finish my labrep part. Or at least half of it. Thank God for helping me out with these, despite the heartbreaks! XD
It's the first week of the last month of the year. And I will be so freaking busy starting tomorrow until the end of eternity.
This semester, I've decided to slowly mix in some org stuff and acad schiz. There wasn't suppose to be any problem 'til another side of my life collided with these two.
I'm supposed to get or either, to apply for my driver's license tomorrow. Also, tomorrow's our org's schedule for Bagsakan, a bidding activity for a booth at the Fair. And, I also need to finish my part of the lab report tomorrow.
My driver's license can't wait, because my student's permit nearing expiration. >.<
Our org's Bagsakan is scheduled only one time, it's tomorrow or never. There should be people going and I'm still supposed to text the USC head about this on who're coming. ARGH. My co-head with this is a senior. And he is busy. And so am I. GAAAHD. I feel our comhead's mad at us. >.<
My part of the lab rep should be done tomorrow. Yes, I admit I have been procastinating a bit. That's because I've been home for the long weekend and homes, I think, are not supposed to be place for acads. I've only finish a quarter of the things I'm supposed to finish. >.<
How I wish I have several clones that can work for me. I need at least three to focus on these things. I guess I have no choice but to let me, myself, and I work.
This was while I wished to sleep, to be knocked down, so that I won't be able to feel anything, especially from the throbbing pain that was at the pit of my stomach.
Taihen desu ne, being a girl.
Especially when you're the type that's really prone to menstrual cramps. >.<
It hurts like hell. Throbbing at your lower abdomen, making you writhe in pain so much that tears would unknowingly spring from your eyes, so much that your hands would absent-mindedly creep unto your head and pull your own hairs.
IT WAS LIKE SH*T FEELING.
And that's what I had today, well, just the morning half.
I got to the point where I was screaming for my Obaa-chan, telling her it really hurts so much! TT_____TT Chou itai desu ne TT____TT
It has never hurt like this since July? August? this year. :(( But this pain, this was much MUCH MORE PAINFUL. ;___;
Ima wa, it starts to hurt again. :'((
Maa, I'll just sleep with it again and hope it would not come back anymore in the morning.
Jaa, minna, oyasumi~ ^_^/